User:Srecko Ilic/Pavkeism
Pavkeism is the state religion of Serbia. Introduced as an official state religion by the president desert hamster, many Serbians found refuge in this religion as a response to the miniature crab attack from North Korea.
Contents
Beliefs
Its beliefs hold that KNJAZ PAVICEVIC is a God and that he will lead Serbia to glory and destruction of Croatia. It's a common belief in Serbia that KNJAZ PAVICEVIC, commonly referred to as "the holiest of them all, our martyr Pavke" is escorted by an invisible army of Techno Vikings, who will rape every, man, women kitty and parrot currently in Slavonia. Another commonly held belief is that Pavke is immortal, and that he holds the power of self-resurrection. He was "banned" by the eRepublik admins twice, but both times he re-emerged victorious and even more powerful.
Holy Bible of Pavke
One of the most famous quotes taken from the Holy Bible, refers to the future 7th attack by Serbian forces on Slavonia.
Holy resurrection
The followers of His Highness Pavke have an ability to resurrect even before they die. It is a common thing in Serbia to see them reborn in a new body (account) when their old body (account) gets old and sick (reaches 3-4 ff points)
Pavke in Serbian epic poetry
Мало ли је такијех јунака(serbian cyrilic) by m-e-pTaB
Slavonia
Chapter 7 Holy gibberish of Hostilian
Suddenly, out of nowhere; the glorious Pavke unleashes his massive horde of Techno Vikings upon the entire area...Both sides are all but annihilated, as Techno Vikings don't give a shit who they slaughter, they do it for teh lulz. Rave beams scorch the ground and massive woofers are set up to provide some boogey music for the massacre. The Vikings rape everything, even the parrots. Nothing is left alive, or unraped for that matter. Slavonia is reduced to a barren wasteland, covered in Techno cum."
Prophecy of Pavke
Pavke's prophecies are translated to the ordinary masses by his Apostles.
First Prophecy of Pavke written by Srecko Ilic
Second Prophecy of Pavke written by Srecko Ilic
Third Prophecy of Pavke written by Hostilian
Fourth Prophecy of Pavke written by Srecko Ilic
WIP
Holy Apostles of Pavke
Pavke has a wide range of followers and priests, popular in the people as "The Holy Apostles of Pavke". Most notable Apostles are NIXI, Hostilian, desert hamster, Srecko Ilic, meptab, SerbianFenceJumper, zexserbia, Bora111, stpeter17 and mladen karavukovo. Their job is to educate the population of Serbia and spread Pavke's light all over the world.
Holy Church of Pavke
Pekara kod Pavketa is actually a bakery in Serbia, but it's one of the holiest places in Serbia. The Q1 bread it produces is considered holy and revered by all Serbians.
Serbian National Defense
Pavke's tequila-guerrilla(his followers) believe that Pavke will return someday, to lead his SNO party to the final destruction of Slavonia, and that he will defeat his Arcibald Rajs' Anti-Pavke blasphemers and put them to death by his holy hand. His Apostles troll SNO's articles every time they can, trying to redeem the blasphemers: Arcibald Rajs, Sorabija and Ravnogorac.
