User:Alexander Janai/Kiwism
User:Alexander Janai/Kiwism
 The Book of Kiwi | |
| Instructions | |
| Chapter One | |
| Chapter Two | |
| Chapter Three | |
| Chapter Four | |
| Chapter Five | |
| Chapter Six | |
| Chapter Seven | |
| Chapter Eight | |
| Chapter Nine | |
Kiwism is a state religion of the Holy Land of New Zealand. It is believed that the Holy Golden Kiwi created the world from wool.
Contents
Beliefs
Kiwists believe that they are desendant to the one original New Zealander, the first man, Jacob of New Zealand. These are the main beliefs of Kiwism:
The Holy Golden Kiwi
The Holy Golden Kiwi is the creator of the World, and he was created from the Holy Wool. From that wool, he created Jacob of New Zealand, the Kiwis, the Moa, the Haast's Eagle, the Maori, zaney, Sasha Igorovich, Balash, Albanian, Isidor, Olivia, Alexis bonte, George Lemnaru and Snow Gibbon.
The Golden Kiwi is the protector of the Holy Land, New Zealand, In the Past, In the Present, and in the Future.
Wool
Wool, believed by the Kiwists, is the most holy thing in the world, exept the Holy Golden Kiwi. It created the Golden Kiwi, and the Golden Kiwi, created the world from it. Now it can be found on sheeps in New Zealand.
When a Kiwist baby is born, wool of sheeps in New Zealand, is streched on his head, then he is declared Kiwist.
When a Kiwist dies, He becomes wool, and the wool is set in the Cave of Gardner's Gut, which turned immidiatly to a million straws of cristal.
8 Commandments of Kiwism
The 8 Commandments of Kiwism are a list of laws that are needed to be filled, to be a batter human beign, a pure one. All Kiwists must live by these laws and fulfill them correctly.
Book of Kiwi
The Book of Kiwi was written by the prophet Alexander Janai. The books is the most holy book of New New Zealand, and the world itself. The book is describing the history of New Zealand, of the Golden Kiwi, of Jacob of New Zealand of his grand grand..... son Michael the Prophet, and the war against Evilus (MUHAHAHAHA!)
Chronicles
Alexander Janai in his dream, the whole out going of the future and the past, so he wrote the Book of Kiwi. But he thought about it again and he added in another book, the lifes of all the people in the Book of Kiwi. He called it Chronicles.
Story of Death
Alexander Janai, by trying to think about a way to explain the holiness of the Golden Kiwi, thought about a fable. The Golden Kiwi told him about three evil items, that cannot be used at all. The sword of Death (Death as a person, the Grim Reaper), the clock of Death and the horn of Death. The items are spreading across the world, with the Golden Kiwi cannot trak them down, because they are made of Death's hands and soul. And Alexander Janai thought about a story, more correctly, a fable, that goes along with the items, explaining the evilness of the items, and the harassy of the users of the items.
The fable can be found HERE.
People of Kiwism
There are some core people that are mentioned in the Book of Kiwi:
Jacob of New Zealand
Jacob of New Zealand is the first man, and the only son of the Holy Golden Kiwi. He was lonely so he asked his father the create hima world, so the Golden Kiwi created him a world from holy Wool. (Described in Chapter II of the Book of Kiwi)
Michael the Prophet
Michael the Prophet is the great-great-great-great-great-great-grand son of Jacob of New Zealand. He traveled across the world, to tell about the holiness of the Golden Kiwi (As described in Chapter Four and Chanpter Five).
Evilus (MUHAHAHAHA!)
Evilus (MUHAHAHAHA!) is the combination of two men, Eveal and Eveel. One from South Africa and one from Germany. He went to Netherlands (Named in the holy book as Dutchland), and started there an army. The Netherlanders, wanted to attack New Zealand and they still do. The title MUHAHAHAHA! was given to Evilus (MUHAHAHAHA!) after he laughed in Otago, to show him that the New Zealanders with laugh at the end.
Alexander Janai
Alexander Janai is the prophet that wrote the entire Book of Kiwi. He also uncovered the Notes of Michael, that Michael wrote when he was in India.
Practices
Wooling
The practice of Wooling is used on the new born, to declare him, and make him a Kiwist. The practice needed to be done like so:
- Stretching the wool across the baby's head.
- Saying:In the name of the Holy Golden Kiwi, and in the name of the defeting of MUHAHAHAHA!, I declare this baby Kiwist!
- Thats it... The baby is a Kiwist.
Clauthing
The Clauthing practice, is used on the dead. When a Kiwist, or a New Zealander, dies, his body turned into Wool. The Wool is needed to be buried in the Cave near Auckland, named:"Gardner's Guts Cave". The wool immediately will become a million straws of cristal.
Protecting
Like the Holy Golden Kiwi, the New Zealanders and the Kiwists must protect the Holy Land of New Zealand. So every Kiwist must protect his holy land, rather it is litteraly, with words, of military, with war.
Ranks
- Kiwist - Lowest rank, a simple Kiwist
- Holy - Second Level, Holy, ultimate believer of the Golden Kiwi
- McNuggets - Name of Food, level Three. Ready to become Nuggets for the Golden Kiwi
- Moa Rider - Fourth Level, Rider of the second animal created by the Golden Kiwi
- Maori - Fifth Level, Holy as the Maori
- Teacher - Sixth Level, Teacher of the Book of Kiwi to everyone.
- Traveller - Seventh level, optional, Travels the World and teaching the Book of Kiwi - Like Michael the Prophet
- Disclaimer - Seventh Level, will be, denying the existance of the Dutchlanders.
- Kiwi Fighter - Eighth level, gained, when you protect New Zealand
- Assistant Prophet - Nineth Level, second most hardest level to gain, the Prophet is giving the title to someone he chooses.
- Prophet - Tenth Level, most holy level, given by a previous Prophet, if notm the Assistant Prophet become the Prophet after the Prophet dies. There can be only one prophet, like the Assistant Prophet. Current Prophet - Alexander Janai. Each Prophet must write something in his life time, Alexander Janai wrote the Book of Kiwi.
Kiwism Connected Topics
- Notes of Michael - The notes that Michael the Prophet wrote while he was in India
- Book of Kiwi - The Holy Scripture of Kiwism, written by Alexander Janai
- Alexander Janai - The Prophet/Writer of the Holy Scripture
Demographics
Currently the official followers of the Golden Kiwi are:
Temples
Currently there is only one active temple, called Temple of Kiwism and he is placed in the Holy City of Wellington.
Structure of Temples
Commanding
Each temple has a teacher, that is in charge of the temple. He arranges the prayers, and the only one that can listen to the confessions, in his temple.
In the Temple of Kiwism in Wellington, is like the eVatican of the eCatholicism, as the pope, is in charge of the main church in the eVatican. In Kiwism its the same. The Prophet, in our case Alexander Janai is in charge of the Temple of Kiwism.
Ceremonies
Birth of the Kiwi
Each Friday mornning, all the Kiwists on New Zealand gather around in the temple, and there they preform, with the teacher, the "Creation of the Kiwi".
It goes in this steps:
- Eat a sheep meat, to represent the start of the Universe.
- Bless on the sheep this:whakapai Tapu Koura Kiwi notemea hanga mea katoa a ao nui mārama a tangata *
- Drink the Beer
- Go to the alter
- Say:whakahirahira Tapu Koura Kiwi, whakapai ōku kāinga tipu, ōku whānau ōku kāinga.**
* Means:Bless the Holy Golden Kiwi because he created all and the universe and Humans
** Means:O great Holy Golden Kiwi, bless my Homeland, my family, and my home
Confession
The most holy day for Kiwism is Friday, but in the other days of the week, evey Kiwist, and even every human in eRepublik can go to the Temple and confess on his Sins, and the things he did.
Everyone can confess on everything, and the Teacher of the Temple, or in the case of the Temple of Kiwism, the Prophet, will never tell no body.
