User:Khebit/Book of Sheep/Chapter II

CHAPTER I • CHAPTER II • CHAPTER III • CHAPTER IV • CHAPTER V

Maori

The Holy Sheep said, “Let us make man. And let them have dominion over the fish of the sea and over the birds of the heavens and over the livestock and over all the earth.” And the sheep appointed a chosen people, the Maori, to do their bidding and spread their wisdom and goodness the world over. The Maori people lived a life of peace and ease, until the coming of the giant octopus. The giant octopus said unto the sheep "HRNGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG", and it was good man. After the octopuses' coming, people from the whole world came to New Zealand and introduced the Maori to the complications of international relations and economics. But the Giant octopus was not content with the creation of Man, and his actions led to the corruption of Man, and he is known as the Great deceiver. The great Deceiver told the pure Moari to go swimming... Swimming was frowned upon by the god Sheepy. (As he himself could not swim) In an act of jealousy, Sheepy decided that the pure Maori must suffer for swimming. And so punishment came: Sheepy told the pure Maori they could no longer eat grass, a favorite past-time of theirs. The eMaoris shagged the eSheeps, and the eSheeps gave birth to eAustralians. The half-sheep, half men eAustralians then mated with the eKoalas, and they gave birth to eIndonesians. And so the Age of Sheep became the Age of Man.