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Revision as of 17:14, 14 December 2012

This user is a proud Dioist. He has been blessed by Dio.

	“ It only ends once. Anything that happens before that is just progress. ”
	(Jacob)

Longbaugh (pronounced \lȯŋˈbau\; born day 479) is a politician, soldier, public intellectual, entrepreneur, and gonzo journalist from the United States.

Early Life

Longbaugh was born on on day 479 of the New World (Friday the 13th of March, 2009) in Dallas, Texas.

Upon reaching level 7, Longbaugh joined the United States Workers Party under party president ProggyPop. He worked and trained every day for 89 days before a regularly-scheduled maintenance session went over-schedule and he missed out on his third Hard Worker medal in a row. Regardless, he continues to work every day.

In those first three months he bounced around numerous jobs and was fairly active on the eUS and USWP forums. He became known as a fierce critic of Uncle Sam, Dio Brando, and the beta giant sub-culture in general. He campaigned for scrabman all four times he ran for the presidency—the first time, losing to Uncle Sam's bullshit "George W. Bush/Chuck Norris" re-election campaign.

In May of 2009 Longbaugh was elected the fifth congressman of Hawai'i. In July of 2009 he defected to Ireland but moved again to Indonesia a few weeks later to fight against Fortis and EDEN.

Upon the conclusion of World War III Longbaugh returned to Ireland. He lived there for four months until February of 2010, when he permanently relocated to the United Kingdom.

On Day 635 he converted to Dioism upon the personal blessing of Dio Brando himself. He credits the death of darkplayer82 (a Theocrat) in August of 2009 as the catalyst for his re-consideration of the core faith.

Achievements

Longbaugh has received 57 awards:

Before the corporate reset he was the owner, president, and CEO of Orchid Worldwide (headquartered in London), Red Son Industries (headquartered in Moscow), and Biffco (headquartered in Las Vegas, Nevada). He remains the founder and press director of Chin Music (formerly The Long Bow), the oldest gonzo newspaper in the New World.

Citizenship History

USA (3/09 - 7/09) (10/12 - )
Texas, Florida, Hawai'i

Indonesia (7/09 - 11/09)
Java, occupied California, occupied Texas, Guangdong, occupied KwaZulu-Natal

Ireland (11/09 - 2/10)
Dublin, Louth

UK (2/10 - 9/10)
London, West Midlands, East Midlands, occupied Vestlandet

Pakistan (9/10 - 10/12)
Punjab, Sindh, occupied Andhra Pradesh, occupied Eastern Thailand, occupied Balochistan

File:Icon achievement phoenix on.gifPolitics

	“ There is hopeful symbolism in the fact that flags do not wave in a vacuum. ”
	(Arthur C. Clarke)

Longbaugh describes himself as a former atheist, an unapologetic polemicist, and a proudly-staunch liberal.

Longbaugh left Texas in April of 2009 for the Aloha State of Hawai'i. He created the newspaper The Long Bow initially as a tool for his first congressional campaign in May of 2009, posting his first article on May 23, immediately after being nominated by the USWP for the seat. It was after writing that first article that he first encountered the dirty nature of U.S. politics when Congressman Tormod of Utah immediately thrashed him for even daring to challenge his alleged friend changewillcome for the seat. Though, it should be noted that Longbaugh later learned that the two were never friends and that Tormod only acted the way he did because he was a party hack who was simply defending a fellow party member.

On May 25th Longbaugh was elected to Congress from the great state of Hawai'i. After being assigned to a junior seat on the Military Committee, he began work in the USWP-dominated 18th United States Congress under President scrabman. His term was fairly standard; except for caving to inexperience and jumping the committee process on an import tax bill. Nevertheless, he published his voting record every week and explained his reasons behind each vote.

His re-election campaign was not a success. He was initially challenged by fingerguns of the Libertarian Party until fingerguns had to drop out due to the ineptitude of party president Claire Littleton (who apparently forgot she was PP). As a result of vote moving by the Libertarian Partyhis replacement, James Harding, defeated Longbaugh by one vote.

At this point he became a private citizen, working and fighting every day in the war games with Ireland. He wrote an article detailing what he called, "the fundamental problem with small parties," and got a lot of criticism for what was otherwise a level-headed analysis of why the USWP dominates every election. However, it wasn't until he wrote an article "thanking" the United Independents Party for the federal criminal Congressman Robert S. Miller (who attempted to liquidate the Federal Reserve) that he drew fire from all fronts.

USWP party president Zcia asked that he remove the article, as it was unnecessarily drawing criticism of the USWP—though Longbaugh never mentioned his party in either the article or in any of his replies to comments. He made such knowledge known. However, upon Zcia pressing the matter, he politely declined, resigned from the USWP, and continued pressing UIP party president Ansen to issue a statement regarding their nomination of, and campaign to put Robert S. Miller in congress.

After the statement was finally issued by the UIP (with no acknowledgment of Longbaugh's plight), Longbaugh declared the issue to be dead. However, Ansen decided to continue going after Longbaugh and called upon his friends to do the same; showering his articles and his PM box with insults. Over the course of a few days Longbaugh had a conversation with the banned Robert S. Miller (as HiFat Industries) and learned that Miller's corruption was only the tip of the iceberg regarding both the United Independents Party and the Libertarian Party.

This, in addition to the dissolution of ATLANTIS on May 21st and the subsequent disorganized formation of Fortis and EDEN, caused Longbaugh to become so disenfranchised that he quit his job and moved to Navan, in the Louth.

After moving to Indonesia in July of 2009, Longbaugh ran for office three times in three different regions; losing each election. Upon his return to Ireland he won three successive elections.

Indonesia

Upon his defection from the United States in July of 2009, Longbaugh moved to Ireland. Befriending numerous polite Irish, Longbaugh felt comfortable and at ease; even though the people slandering him with unsubstantiated accusations continued to do so in replying to his then-Irish newspaper articles. He resented what he called the "schoolyard" politics of the United States and made it known to every American going out of their way to insult him from across the Atlantic.

Nursing a hangover at his home in Navan, Ireland. When Indonesia invaded Hawai'i on July 13, 2009 (effectively starting World War III), Longbaugh decided to get involved. Considering the United States would be busy fending off four nations, war games would be indefinitely suspended. He informed his employer, his party, and his newfound countrymen that he was moving to Indonesia to fight for PEACE GC and would return to his adopted homeland after the war.

Electoral History in Indonesia

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August 2009 Election (Texas)

Candidate	Party	Votes	Pct.
semarangindah	36px	16 (elected)	59.3%
Longbaugh	36px	6	22.2%
don Aholic		5	18.5%

September 2009 Election (KwaZulu-Natal)

Candidate	Party	Votes	Pct.
CaPiTaNo	36px	5 (elected)	41.6%
Longbaugh	36px	2	16.7%
Bajaj	36px	2	16.7%
Butt_Muncher		2	16.7%
Nandya Chantique		1	8.3%

October 2009 Election (Guangdong)

Candidate	Party	Votes	Pct.
xbuzter		23 (elected)	39%
pandu saksono	36px	18 (elected)	30.5%
Longbaugh	36px	14	23.7%
DOL4R		4	6.8%

Ireland

	“ I never give them hell. I just tell the truth and they think it's hell. ”
	(Harry Truman)

Upon his defection from the United States in July of 2009, Longbaugh moved to Ireland. Befriending numerous polite Irish, Longbaugh felt comfortable and at ease; even though the people slandering him with unsubstantiated accusations continued to do so in replying to his then-Irish newspaper articles. He resented what he called the "schoolyard" politics of the United States and made it known to every American going out of their way to insult him from across the Atlantic.

When Indonesia invaded Hawai'i on July 13, 2009 (effectively starting World War III), Longbaugh decided to get involved. Considering the United States would be busy fending off four nations, war games would be indefinitely suspended. He informed his employer, his party, and his newfound countrymen that he was moving to Indonesia to fight for PEACE GC and would return to his adopted homeland after the war.

On day 724 Longbaugh returned to Ireland upon the news that Indonesia had resigned from PEACE GC. He almost immediately announced his candidature for a Dublin seat in the Dáil Éireann, running as a member of the Irish Union Party. Competing against eleven other candidates (four from his own party), Longbaugh was narrowly elected to the sixth seat by one vote.

In January of 2010 Poland (fresh off a record baby boom) invaded the United Kingdom in the name of EDEN. President Edana Savage issued an order for the Irish Defence Forces to stand-down, effectively putting the final nail in the coffin of the technically-invalid Raleigh Treaty. Longbaugh wrote an article declaring his firm position that Ireland should help the UK in the face of invasion, if only to further relations with the neighboring world power. The article was met with much opposition from Irish citizens; though some Irish (including elected Teachta Dála's) expressed support for aid to the UK. Regardless of the expected—and customary—reaction to Longbaugh's article, it still managed to receive over a hundred votes (which is a rarity in such a small and partially-active nation like Ireland).

On Day 800 Longbaugh penned an article addressing Theocracy's abandonment of Pakistan upon invasion by India. His principle criticism was rooted in then-recent recent relocation of all Theocrats to pig-disgusting Spain in December of 2009. The article gained worldwide attention among Dioists, anti-Dioists, and Theocrats alike; eventually drawing the attention of the principle Theocratic deity himself, Dio Akira.

He resigned as Teachta Dála of Dublin on Day 818 of the New World.

Electoral History in Ireland

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November 2009 Election (Dublin)

Candidate	Party	Votes	Pct.
Bryan O'Shea		18 (elected)	21.4%
AppleMan	36px	16 (elected)	19%
Daniel Kaffe	36px	16 (elected)	19%
O Bass	36px	8 (elected)	9.5%
Tarazis Sati		6 (elected)	7.1%
Longbaugh		5 (elected)	6%
Angry-Hobbit	36px	4	4.8%
Highonsnow		3	3.6%
Mark200		3	3.6%
cycocool	36px	3	3.6%
Bradums	36px	1	1.2%
dawid1600	36px	1	1.2%

December 2009 Re-Election (Dublin)

Candidate	Party	Votes	Pct.
Daniel Kaffe	36px	10 (elected)	18.5%
O Bass	36px	9 (elected)	16.5%
Longbaugh		8 (elected)	14.8%
Mr. Lassan	36px	5 (elected)	9.2%
Teutorix Aleria	36px	4 (elected)	7.4%
Zip Nolan	36px	4 (elected)	7.4%
dude80	36px	3	5.5%
JOJEGZ	36px	3	5.5%
Mr Ginge	36px	3	5.5%
Highonsnow		2	3.7%
Bryan O'Shea		1	1.8%
Mr-Ross	36px	1	1.8%
Aaron890		1	1.8%

January 2010 Re-Election (Dublin)

Candidate	Party	Votes	Pct.
Daniel Kaffe	36px	9 (elected)	18.5%
Longbaugh		8 (elected)	16.3%
John Jay	36px	7 (elected)	14.3%
Ronan Donovan	36px	7 (elected)	14.3%
Mr. Lassan	36px	5 (elected)	10.2%
Highonsnow		4 (elected)	8.2%
TheManTheyCallDave	36px	3	6.1%
DirkDigller		2	4.1%
Neil P v2.0	36px	1	2%
Mr-Ross	36px	1	2%
James Kestrel	36px	1	2%
AislingZircon		1	2%

United Kingdom

Longbaugh moved to London in February of 2010 to fight off the EDEN invasion. Almost immediately upon arriving in London, he applied for citizenship. His citizenship application was personally approved by GLaDOS.

In March of 2009 Longbaugh ran for Parliament in London as a member of the center Radical Freethinkers Alliance. He garnered 27 votes but failed to secure one of London's three seats. Four additional seats were won as wildcards as London is by far the most populated region of the UK and therefore sees the highest voter turnout.

On April 22nd (Day 884) he announced his candidacy for a West Midlands seat as a member of the RFA. He won and took his seat in the House of Commons the next day; the same day that the Radical Freethinkers Alliance changed its name to Spectrum.

When the British Army attacked Norway on Day 973 Longbaugh purchased a cottage in the Indre Arna suburb of Bergen, Vestlandet to dig in for the war. As was famously documented in a ZA MUDRUDO special report on pig-disgusting culture Longbaugh had to be summarily treated every day on a wooden slab at his Indre Arna home due to the ancient Nordic custom of playing nonstop trance music from from dusk until dawn. He was one of a handful of MPs who traveled with government staff while in Norway. During the war, per suggestion or request, Longbaugh allowed Nords in his staff to mask themselves when appearing in public with him to protect their identity from Norwegian revolutionaries and terrorists. He sold the cottage when he departed to Pakistan.

After a month out of Parliament, due to Polish occupation of every British region but London on election day, Longbaugh won his third term in the House of Commons; this time winning in East Midlands as a member of the re-established RFA.

On Day 1,031 Longbaugh moved to Pakistan to help rebuild the Glorious Empire with the 3rd generation of Dioists in Stone Ocean, the fourth incarnation of /v/.

Electoral History in the United Kingdom

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March 2010 Election (London)

Candidate	Party	Votes	Pct.
coram_boy		126 (elected)	19.8%
GLaDOS		108 (elected)	17.1%
bowen199		54 (elected)	8.5%
John Bartlett	36px	52 (elected)	8.2%
Skalg von Tuari		48 (elected)	7.5%
Raziel Darkheart		45 (elected)	7.1%
Lemuel Gengulfus	36px	39 (elected)	6.1%
Alex Lawrence		35	5.5%
Gabriel McCook	36px	30	4.7%
Longbaugh	36px	27	4.2%
George Norfolk	36px	25	3.9%
Anaxima	36px	21	3.3%
Jack Jockson		14	2.2%
Wes Carroll		7	1.1%
treehugsfriends		5	0.8%

April 2010 Election (West Midlands)

Candidate	Party	Votes	Pct.
Longbaugh	36px	7 (elected)	25.9%
Margaret H Thatcher		7 (elected)	25.9%
Skillz88		7 (elected)	25.9%
Matt Smidley	36px	4	14.8%
Bob the terrorist		2	7.4%

May 2010 Re-Election (West Midlands)

Candidate	Party	Votes	Pct.
John Forseti		6 (elected)	35.3%
Longbaugh	36px	4 (elected)	23.5%
Jimmy Cricket		4 (elected)	23.5%
awesommmez		2	11.8%
Margaret H Thatcher		1	5.9%

July 2010 Election (East Midlands)

Candidate	Party	Votes	Pct.
Longbaugh	36px	5 (elected)	26.3%
Dendodge		4 (elected)	21%
James Woosh		4 (elected)	21%
Draaglom		3	15.8%
Tom Phillips		1	5.3%
Dan/naD Wilshire		1	5.3%
Pineapple64		1	5.3%

August 2010 Re-Election (East Midlands)

Candidate	Party	Votes	Pct.
Longbaugh	36px	3 (elected)	18.5%
Anaxima		2 (elected)	12.5%
IndieKid		2 (elected)	12.5%
Margaret H Thatcher		2 (elected)	12.5%
Valorum		2 (elected)	12.5%
Lord Matthew Russell		2 (elected)	12.5%
DuffelBag		2 (elected)	12.5%
Paul Lawrence Grundy	36px	1	6.5%

Pakistan

	“ There is no god but Dio, and Falcon is his prophet. ”
	(Ancient Pakistani proverb)

On day 1,031 a group of Dioists from the United States began organizing a repatriation movement back to the Glorious Empire of Pakistan. Upon learning of this Longbaugh answered the worldwide call to return to his spiritual homeland, regardless of the movement's American origins. Led by Max McFarland 2 one of the richest men in the New World, they called themselves The Exodus.

It was during The Exodus that Pakistan expanded its borders into India for crimes ancient but unforgotten by Dioists. At the height of the operation the Glorious Empire occupied nearly all of India. Longbaugh was serving as a kongressman in Sindh at the outset of the war and branched out to run in both of the occupied regions of Maharashtra and Andhra Pradesh.

After three months the call to come home was sent out, and Indian forces began to retake their lands. Eventually, they pushed beyond their own reconquered borders and further into Pakistan. Indian president Swathikrishnan, for reasons left largely a mystery, decided to leave the region of Sindh alone. Pakistan would once again be reduced to a singular region surrounded by occupation and chaos.

It was then that Longbaugh, having long ago relinquished his desire to be American, decided not to head back with his fellow Dioists. He decided instead that his call was to stay. So, on Christmas of 2010 (day 1,132), after most of the remaining Dioists had returned home, Longbaugh retreated deep into the Kirthar Mountains north of Karachi where he had been constructing a fortress embedded inside a mountain. A few weeks later he received word that Max McFarland 2 had died. The shocking news drove Longbaugh into deep meditation and there, in the heart of the Glorious Empire that has risen and fallen with the sands of time, he would self-sustain and live off the land until he was ready to return to the New World.

It wouldn't be until nearly two years later on day 1,798 that Longbaugh would return from his long sabbatical. He had re-emerged from the holy mountains having shed his previous form and grown a new one—slimmer, stronger, and ready to fight. After gathering necessary possessions and sealing the door to his fortress of solitude Longbaugh walked the 53-mile journey south to Karachi, where he would board a commercial jet bound for for the land of his birth: the United States of America.

Electoral History in Pakistan

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September 2010 Election (Sindh)

Candidate	Party	Votes	Pct.
Devon Donaldson		3 (elected)	12.4%
bozli		3 (elected)	12.4%
Max McFarland 2		2 (elected)	8.3%
Longbaugh		2 (elected)	8.3%
kotekzot jr		2 (elected)	8.3%
hands.of.law		2 (elected)	8.3%
Farooq e Azam		2 (elected)	8.3%
Joshua Patterson		1 (elected)	4.1%
Anom		1 (elected)	4.1%
Tahir Awan		1	4.1%
Dr. Padro		1	4.1%
Farhat Bano		1	4.1%
JonathanJoestar		1	4.1%
ahmad0055		1	4.1%
Foqi Must		1	4.1%

October 2010 Election (Maharashtra)

Candidate	Party	Votes	Pct.
Longbaugh		2 (elected)	50%
bozli		1 (elected)	25%
ishaqueghani		1	25%

November 2010 Election (Andhra Pradesh)

Candidate	Party	Votes	Pct.
Captain Briggs		2 (elected)	%66.7
Longbaugh		1 (elected)	%33.3

United States

In October of 2012, after a 22-month sabbatical in the Kirthar Mountains of Pakistan Longbaugh and moved back to the United States to live in Dallas, Texas, the city of his birth. Four days later he was granted citizenship, becoming an American again after over three years abroad (he renounced his citizenship in July of 2009).

Upon his return he was delighted to find that some old Dioists had formed a political refuge party, Stardust Crusaders USA, in the grand tradition of God-Emperor Dio Brando and High Priest AgentChieftain.

Electoral History in the United States

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May 2009 Election (Hawai'i)

Candidate	Party	Votes	Pct.
Longbaugh	36px	8 (elected)	29.7%
Crut	36px	6	22.2%
changewillcome	36px	6	22.2%
Resce		4	14.8%
Aaron Webb	36px	3	11.1%

June 2009 Re-Election (Hawai'i)

Candidate	Party	Votes	Pct.
James Harding		13 (elected)	52%
Longbaugh	36px	12	48%

November 2012 Election

Party	Name	Votes	Pct.
36px	American Freedom Alliance	890	33%
36px	American Military Party	674	25%
	Federalist Party	455	17%
36px	United States Workers Party	418 (unelected)	15%
36px	We the People	260	9%

File:Icon achievement peace on.gifMilitary History

	“ My flanks are something for the enemy to worry about, not me. Before he finds out where my flanks are I'll be cutting the bastard's throat. ”
	(George S. Patton)

Longbaugh considers himself to have never been formally involved with the United States Armed Forces. He claims that the U.S. army never officially recognized him as a soldier and forced him to pay for his own weapons and moving tickets every time he fought. When he lived in Indonesia, after leaving the United States, he also was never a member of the military (having never bothered to enlist).

When Longbaugh moved back to Ireland in November of 2009 he enlisted in the Irish Defence Forces, serving in the Leinster Rangers division. Upon reaching the field marshal threshold, he was transferred to Na Fianna.

British Army

After moving to the UK in February of 2010 Longbaugh immediately enlisted in the military, serving in the Royal Parachute Regiment; the tanking division of the British armed forces. Upon the merger of the Royal Parachute Regiment with the Royal Marines (into the Special Forces Support Group), Longbaugh was transferred to Task Force 41, A Company.

The entire British military was reorganized on April 21, 2010 as part of the national preparation for eRepublik Rising. Longbaugh was subsequently transferred to 23 SAS; the helicopter division of the Special Air Service.

Paratrooper Corporal Sergeant

• Royal Parachute Regiment (Rank: Paratrooper)
• Special Forces Support Group (Rank: Corporal)
• Special Air Service (Rank: Sergeant)

• Royal Parachute Regiment Service (More than a month of service in the RPR, from 2/16 - 3/18/10)
• Special Forces Support Group Service (More than a month of military service in the SFSG, from 3/19 - 4/18/10)
• Special Air Service Service (More than a month of military service in the SAS, from 4/21 - 5/21/10)
• Great British Campaign (EDEN Invasion of the United Kingdom)
• Belgian Independence Campaign (Brussels Rebellion)
• Western European Campaign (Spanish Invasion of France)
• Ulster Campaign (Northern Ireland Resistance War)
• Amazon Campaign (Peru-Brazil War)
• Nordic Campaign (British Invasion of Norway)

American Military

Upon his return to the United States in October of 2012 Longbaugh was drafted into the Top Gun military unit commanded by Publius himself. He was immediately assigned to the 3rd regiment to assist in repelling Austrian resistance efforts in occupied Carinthia.

On day 1,808 Longbaugh was awarded his first Battle Hero medal for dealing 1,442,320 points worth of damage in the French effort to conquer Aosta Valley from the Republic of Macedonia. He proceeded to fight at least 70 times per day and increased his rank from a one-star Lieutenant Colonel to a two-star Field Marshal in just over a month since returning. On day 1,839 he was fully admitted into the privately-funded Easy Company, the largest military unit in the United States. However, his stint in EZC wouldn't last long as he would be granted a special exemption to be admitted into the Ultramarines commanded by Grand Duchess Artela.

On day 1,850 Longbaugh broke the 2 million battle damage mark for the first time successfully defending occupied Northern Taiwan from the Taiwanese resistance force.

The Lowdown

Longbaugh is an avid baseball and football fan. His favorite teams are the Texas Rangers and the Dallas Cowboys.

He lives inside the fortified observation decks of the Reunion Tower in downtown Dallas, Texas.

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Wiki Editor Account: Longbaugh